Crisps. In a sandwich. Sold to order in a shop. We can die happy now
"A crisp sandwich shop, you say? Oh, what will those cereal-munching, penny farthing-riding hipsters come up with next?"
STOP. Stop right there, as remarkably, England's first ever crisp sandwich shop hasn't opened in a basement-bar-slash-hairdressers-slash-Korean-barbecue in east London, but in Keighley, west Yorkshire instead.
Mr Crisp (simple yet effective) has now opened and it's come hot on the heels of the Simply Crispy cafe in Belfast, which actually began life as a spoof newspaper report. Yep, because that's how restaurants in 2015 come to fruition now.
Mr Crisp is sadly not owned by a man of the same name, but by a Mr Mark Pearson who has stocked up the cafe with a range of 50 types of crisps including Monster Munch, Pom-Bears, Hula Hoops, McCoy's and Space Raiders served in white or brown bread, baguettes and even teacakes. And, for those who have a more refined palate, a selection of condiments including salad cream, Marmite, lemon curd, Nutella and peanut butter are also on offer.
Mark told news agency Guzelian: "When I saw the one launch in Belfast, I thought the only way I can find out if a crisp sandwich shop can succeed over here is by giving it a go myself. I sat on the idea for six months, working on sourcing which crisps and flavours to have and doing some market research."
He said: "The feedback has been really positive. People are interested in having the option of a different kind of sandwich. We all have our own likes and dislikes, some of us even have strange requests when it comes to what we eat and I hope to cater for them by offering something different."
He added: "I really like peanut butter but finding anyone in the area who actually puts it on a sandwich is almost impossible."
If the sales of the retro snack go well, there are plans to open up several more shops in late 2015. Give it two more months, then expect England's first artisanal crisp on sourdough sandwich pop-up in east London anyway.